When did I get old?

This year, my kid is going to homecoming. How did that freaking happen? Seriously, I still remember my homecoming - I thought that I would be old enough for my memories of homecoming to fade before my offspring experienced this slice of high school life.

Homecoming is always a special time for me...but not for the reasons one would think. Since I was taller than the other guys and could kick most of their butts, it's no surprise that boys weren't beating down my door to ask me for a date. One year, I did get asked and then, he promptly stood me up after I had purchased not one, but two dresses for the event. My senior year, the teachers had to cajole on the of the football players to ask me to Homecoming and since he was the only one likely to ask, I said 'yes.' Then, my friends all got catty and stopped talking to me that week. The claws came out during the homecoming attendent voting and it seems that I was the only one that got scratched...that's what happens when you are the Homecoming Queen. Yeah, me.

So, my memories of homecoming aren't the best. And now, I have to try to keep my memories (baggage) from infecting her experience.

I keep asking myself why I still care about the fact that I was never asked to Homecoming or Prom. It's been 20 years and deep down, way down, I am still a little tweaked. Stupid, I know.

As I look at my daughter and think about how strange it is to watch her grapple with the quasi-socio-political quagmire that outlines the high school experience, I hope that perhaps she might realize her self-worth much sooner than her mother did. That her enjoyment of life experiences isn't tied to a specific "must-have" list, but rather she enjoy the good of life and learn from the bad.

That's what I hope for, but it's up to her to deliver.